I went for a pedicure today. I just went over to the little quickie place at the mall. Melissa and Savannah met me over there--a little girl time together.
You don't expect Spa treatment at the mall nail salon. You expect a quick, okay manicure or pedicure and you expect a little pressure from your foreign nail gal about how "vay pwetty" some 3 inch, airbrushed gel nails would be on your hands. I knew this going in. I was ready.
Well. My particular foreign nail putter-onner apparently just really didn't want to be bothered with yet another richie "round eye" with bad nails on this particular day. Broken-English-Speaking-Miniskirt-Wearing-I'm-Better-Than-You-Nail-Girl decided that not only did I need gel nails to be put on over my own "no look good" nails, but apparently my eyebrows were just disgusting her with their blatant unevenness: "Dey look vay bad. I shape dem fuh you, reah fas".
After the third disparaging remark about my eyebrows and nails, and my third polite refusal of airbrushed gel nails and a "reah fas" brow waxing, she begins loudly chattering with the other nail persons in their foreign tongue. They laughed and bantered back and forth loudly with me sitting right there, gritting my teeth, rolling my eyes at Melissa and trying not to reach across and grab Rude-Foreign-Nail-Girl by her scrawny little neck.
I've never felt SO much like I was living a Seinfeld episode. I'm sitting there, knowing full well that I'm being verbally slammed behind my back--well, in front of my face, really--and knowing I can't nail anybody about it (no pun intended!). I would catch a word of Engish every now and then and concentrate really hard on what they were saying, trying to catch them dissing me.
No luck. They're sly, in their own foreign way. I'll give them that.
Melissa and Savannah were finished well before me and sat there snickering and exchanging significant glances with me, while their nails dried. Their finger and toenails looked very nice. Apparently their foreign nail personages weren't quite so bitter about their job as mine. Maybe it was just my atrociously uneven eyebrows that made her hate me, I just don't know.
Ah, well. Lesson learned. When going for the mall manicure, one must develop a thick skin.
It's not for the faint of heart! LOL! ;0D
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
7 comments:
Speak english, I stopped getting my nails done because it makes you feel so uncomfortable while you are there. Also, don't you think there's something unnatural about how tiny they are? It makes me feel like a giant sitting there.
Have a great time at the beach.
OMG, this is HILARIOUS! And B's "giant" comment is killing me too! BWAHAHAHA! Is coffee bad for your computer screen? Your nails looked great, and I'll have to check out your eyebrows the next time I see you.......SOoooo funny!
I cannot even comment!! I am laughing too hard!! That is so funny. I love how you can write in the accent.
On a similar topic, Q was asking me over dinner tonight if I had seen your broken nail. I answered no. He replied, "Well, it broke really bad," then with hand motions, "and it didn't even bleed! Isn't that cool? I think she can buy a new one." It was funny.
See you at the beach!! Last one to ride a wave is a rotten egg! (yep, I'm a dork).
I'm thinkin' this is why I will go shooting with Melissa, but not to do girl stuff with her. When my mother made me take modeling classes, I failed (with religious consistency) the "eyebrow care" section of the course. Big, honkin' F! They'd scorn me in several lanugages at the mall. Of course, I have man-brows. Yours aren't so bad, reah. Not vay bah, anyway. ;-)
Thanks for the chuckle.
Dy
DON'T GO THERE ANYMORE!!! Love, Mom
OH this was funny! I have to share my "foreign nail lady story". A friend of mine convinced me it was the greatest thing to have our eyebrows waxed. I was 17 and scared to death but said I'd go if she went first. The lady takes us down to the-basement (yikes) and my friend sits in the chair. The foreign-lady says, "You sit down dare why I do yur friend eyebrow". Okay I mutter and watch. Natalie (my friend) lays back prepared to show me how easy this is. Well, after the first time she starts to squirm and then all out starts crying!!! The foreign-lady looks at me and says, "you dun worry - your friend big baby!" ROFL!!! I did get into the chair and I didn't cry, even though the fact she was eating something fishy and wrapped in seaweed while talking in my face made me want to. She kept saying, "you have very big eyebrow". Hmmmmmmmmm
Thanks for the memories and the laughs!
PS. That place was condemned by the Dept of Health a few months later. How scary is that???
True story!
Post a Comment